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Wed, Oct 20


NSKL Workshop Perfectionism Isn't Kind

Learn how to use Kind Leadership to reduce the negative effects of perfectionism on yourself, others and society.

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NSKL Workshop Perfectionism Isn't Kind
NSKL Workshop Perfectionism Isn't Kind

Time & Location

Oct 20, 2021, 9:00 AM – 11:00 AM,

About the Event

About this workshop:

As a leader, are you often frustrated and unhappy when others’  performance doesn’t live up to your expectations? Are you angry with  team members when they inevitably make a mistake? Do you fear that your  reputation will be tarnished if those who report to you don’t do their  work perfectly? As a person, do you beat yourself up when you can’t  grasp something new immediately? Do you have anxiety about not  performing as well in your job as you think you should? Do you disparage  yourself constantly for not achieving more? Do you suffer from Imposter  Syndrome? If you’ve answered yes to any of these questions, then you’ve  experienced the unkind, negative effects that perfectionism has on you  and others.

What you will learn:

In this New School for Kind Leaders (NSKL) Workshop, we’ll look at the fractal nature of perfectionism  (self-oriented, other-oriented and socially-prescribed), what the  negative effects are for self, others and society, and learn and  practice specific techniques and activities you can use on a daily basis  to overcome perfectionist tendencies. No one is perfect – or needs to  be. As a Kind Leader, when you focus on reducing perfectionist  tendencies in yourself and others, you model kinder ways to act, react  and interact at work, at home and in the world.

Please note: To fully register for the morning or afternoon  section of this workshop, please use the following links:

Morning Section 

Afternoon Section

By the end of the workshop, you will have practiced:

• Noticing your own perfectionist behaviors and its effects

• Choosing kinder thoughts and words to reduce perfectionism

• How to reflect on and react to fear of failure and societal pressures to be perfect

Benefits of taking this workshop:

You  don't need to be in leadership role or have a leadership title to be a  leader. By participating in this workshop, everyone will increase their  awareness of the perfectionist tendencies in ourselves and others and  learn and practice specific behaviors and techniques to use immediately  to reduce the negative effects of perfectionism in self, others and  society.

Workshop Learning Topics:

Part 1: Why Perfectionism Isn’t Kind

1. Introductory Activity: Participants will write and draw about their own experience with the three  types of perfectionism:

• Self-Oriented – of yourself

• Other-Oriented – of others

• Socially Prescribed – people feeling pressure to meet perceived external pressure

2. Theoretical description of the three types of perfectionism and their fractal quality

3. Discussion of the negative effects of perfectionism

Part 2: Reducing/Eliminating Perfectionism with Kind Leader Practices

1. Reflection Exercise: Notice your own behavior at each fractal level

2. Think Kindly (Self-Oriented Focus)

  • Activity: Create your personal Self-Compassion Mantra

3. Speak Kindly (Other-Oriented Focus)

  • Activity:  Choosing your words kindly (denotative, connotative meanings) to reduce  focus on perfectionism and competition in self-talk and conversations  with others

4. Act Kindly (Societal Focus) - Dealing with Expectations Kindly

  • Activity: Depersonalizing societal messages and expectations
  • Kind Leader Practice Tips: Closing the expectation gap kindly by focusing on collaboration and cooperation, not competition

5. Kind Closing and Next Steps

Workshop Facilitators:

Amy Mervak and Karyn Ross

Have questions or need more information?

Please contact Karyn Ross at or Amy Mervak at

We're  here to help you become confident and comfortable leading with kindness  and are happy to answer any and all questions so that you can get  started!

Everyone is welcome at The New School for Kind Leaders.  We practice Right-Sized Pricing, which means that no one will ever be  turned away based on financial circumstance. We ask that you make a  Tuition Contribution that is comfortable and affordable for you.  Suggested Tuition Contributions can be:

• Working individual (Company paying): $100.00

• Working individual (Paying personally): $50.00

• Not working: $25.00

If  you are able, we also encourage you to add a Pay-It-Forward Tuition  Contribution to help offset costs for others who would like to attend  and are in less fortunate financial circumstances.

We are thankful and grateful for all Tuition Contributions!

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